Montana Jones

Montana n: A state of the northwest United States bordering on Canada. Admitted as the 41st state in 1889. The fourth largest state in the union, it includes vast prairies and numerous majestic mountain ranges.
Syn: Treasure State, Big Sky Country, Last Best Place.

Jones n: slang. An addiction or very deep craving.

Friday, November 30, 2007

Stupid animal

The deer charged out onto the road at a full sprint and I could tell he was changing his mind before he even reached the double yellow line. We weren't going all that fast, taking a curve at 45 or 50 miles per hour. The brake lights on the big sport utility in front of me flashed and the vehicle narrowly missed colliding with the creature. The animal tried to stop and change direction in the middle of the road but it's own momentum was against it. Somehow it missed the oncoming truck, but was not so lucky with the trailer the truck was hauling. The leading corner of the trailer gouged into the animals' side and threw it down on the road. The deer's head struck first, right on the double yellow line. It had a beautiful rack of antlers that shattered against the asphalt and chips of antler flew in all directions. The collision with the ground was brutal and I'm sure the animal was killed in that instant. The carcass rebounded across the road like a pinball, spinning across the ground and spilling blood, guts and antlers on the road. It just missed colliding with the back end of the sport utility in front of me and skidded into my path. I swerved and slowed as best I could in the narrow road but I did not miss it entirely. I could feel my wheels rumble over the deer legs sticking into my lane.

This has always been my greatest fear while driving the roads of Montana. I am more afraid of animals than I am of drunk drivers, bad weather or icy roads. I am becoming a fan of hunting season because it means fewer deer on our roads. I am curious to take up hunting so I can get the satisfaction of blowing away some of these stupid vermin animals before they step in front of my car. Since moving to Montana I have started thinking of deer as giant fucking rats with long legs, hooves and antlers. This particular deer would have had a better end to its life if a hunter had claimed it instead of the road.

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