Montana Jones

Montana n: A state of the northwest United States bordering on Canada. Admitted as the 41st state in 1889. The fourth largest state in the union, it includes vast prairies and numerous majestic mountain ranges.
Syn: Treasure State, Big Sky Country, Last Best Place.

Jones n: slang. An addiction or very deep craving.

Thursday, July 24, 2008


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Wednesday, July 23, 2008

Woman, fetch my beer

Want me to get your beer?
No, please, under no circumstances should you get my beer.
Under no circumstances?
It's the domestic implications that disturb me. <redneck>Woman, fetch muh beer!</redneck>
Ha. Well, if you ever say it like that I'm throwing your ass off the balcony. But I was going to go get my ice tea and I thought while I was up I could bring your beer.
Naw, I'll have it with dinner.

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Tuesday, July 15, 2008

Go jump in a lake

The trail was hot and dry, like trails sometimes are. My feet were feeling abused and trampled by the time I pulled the boots off and replaced them with sandals. I decided I had enough time to go dip my feet in the lake. The water was cool and soothing and when I waded in deep enough for it to start lapping at the hem of my shorts I knew more drastic action was in order.

I waded back to the rocky shore and dropped my hat on the beach. Emptying my pockets I tucked my keys and wallet under the hat and deposited my sunglasses there as well. Then it was a sudden charge back toward the lake and a face first lunge into cold refreshing luxury. I paddled, splashed and swam. It only took a minute or so until I was soothed, even chilled, from the hot trail.

Back at the shore I collected my belongings. When I donned my hat and sunglasses there was a ripple of applause from the people gathered on the boat dock. I laughed and waved at my new fans. Clothes soaked and dripping I made my way up the sidewalk toward the parking lot.

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Sunday, July 06, 2008

Observed in Hungry Horse on the Fourth of July

  • This year the observers were segregated to one side of the street and the participants were on the other.
  • At least one family set up their lawn chairs a full three quarters of a mile up the highway, well out of range.
  • I saw two teenagers duck, cover and crawl into the fetal position when they realized they were too close to their explosives.
  • At least one group found it more entertaining to launch their fireworks horizontally.
  • In the half hour I was there, I saw two explosives go off in the middle of the highway between the passing cars.
  • The alert helicopter was spotted in the Martin City area.
  • One dude with a beer and a mullet was overheard instructing his wife and age seven-ish son: "Are you crazy? That there is a mortar shell, you need to fire it farther back. Put it near those people."

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Tuesday, July 01, 2008

Most snow

It's the most snow I have ever opened up in.
Older Generation:
And A_ said it was the most snow he has ever seen at opening.
Can't be that bad.
Mom said it was the second most snow she has ever opened up in; with the most being when she was a kid in 1954.
Well, she was shorter then.

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