Montana n: A state of the northwest United States bordering on Canada. Admitted as the 41st state in 1889. The fourth largest state in the union, it includes vast prairies and numerous majestic mountain ranges.
Syn: Treasure State, Big Sky Country, Last Best Place.
Jones n: slang. An addiction or very deep craving.
Friday, January 09, 2009
I woke up with a strong onion flavor in my mouth. I had brushed my teeth before bed but the taste was still there, it was strong enough that I had to jump from bed to brush again. Much of the morning was spent munching peanut butter sandwiches and chewing grape bubble gum. The residual onion flavor lingered through a few more tooth brushings and the mid day meal.
I had put my new food processor X-Mas gift to work the other day. I tossed in a couple tomatoes and some jalapeños and onion and green onion and garlic and spice and such. The goal was a Pico de Gaillo type concoction.
Turns out that I did not have enough tomato and the stuff turned into a spicy green sauce. A spicy green onion sauce. You know how your eyes get all watery when you cut raw onion? That burning sensation in your sinus that screams "raw onion!" My sauce tasted just like that. It looked like Jolly Green Giant jism and it was the flavor of Satan's onion patch.
I have been known to eat a raw onion from time to time. I can enjoy strongly flavored foods. This stuff tasted like all the onion tears ever cried got frozen into a solid brick and then clubbed my brain.
This stuff tasted like onion acid was being injected into my sinus.
This stuff tasted like pinpricks of evil.
This stuff tasted like the day I got heat stroke.
This stuff tasted like suffocating under a mountain of onion.
It was not very good and had strong onion overtones.
You would think that by the fifth or sixth sample I would stop trying to cover the flavor with more cumin and basil and just quit eating it.
It tasted like onion spit.
I tried to salvage it by adding a can of tomato sauce and cooking it a bit. I think that helped mellow it a lot, in fact it may have saved it and turned it into a nice salsa. But I was pretty tired of taste testing by this point so I just stuck it in the fridge. My current dilemma is if I should taste it again or let it lurk in my fridge as the mystery condiment discovered years hence? I am in no hurry to try. After the last go around everything tasted like onion for a day; even my toothpaste.
There is more Jones in the archives: February 2005 March 2005 April 2005 May 2005 June 2005 July 2005 August 2005 September 2005 October 2005 November 2005 December 2005 January 2006 February 2006 March 2006 April 2006 May 2006 June 2006 July 2006 August 2006 September 2006 October 2006 November 2006 December 2006 January 2007 February 2007 March 2007 April 2007 May 2007 June 2007 July 2007 August 2007 September 2007 October 2007 November 2007 December 2007 January 2008 February 2008 March 2008 April 2008 May 2008 June 2008 July 2008 August 2008 September 2008 October 2008 November 2008 December 2008 January 2009 February 2009 March 2009 April 2009 May 2009 June 2009 December 2009 January 2010 May 2014