Montana Jones

How to shave off a beard

Try not to notice all the trivial little things your beard does to bother you.

Fail to notice how it cuts the wind, thwarts the cold and makes you look more mature.

Try to pretend you are not really coveting that clean shaven look.

Tell your beard "We need to talk"

Tell your beard "I just don't feel the same way anymore."

Buy your beard chocolates.

Tell your beard "It's not you, it's me."

Take your beard out for one last fancy dinner.

Let your beard cry on your shoulder.

Be gentle but firm with the razor.

Relent a little when the beard says "I can change for you"

Only shave down to a goatee.

Take your goatee out for a night on the town to see how it goes.

Try to pretend you are not really coveting that clean shaven look.

Tell your beard "I'm sorry, it's just not working out."

Let your beard cry on your shoulder.

Make a clean shave.

Take yourself out for a night on the town with head held high.

Feel like crap when you see other guys with nice beards.

Drink beer and tell your friends what a great beard she was.

Plan on finding your beard again in a couple months for a hook up. Just once for old times sake.

Posted by: Montana Jones / 10:28 AM