Montana Jones

House Plant

Mom:

I had to take a closer look at that plant. I thought it might be something you are not supposed to have.

Me:

Oh.

Mom:

So what kind of plant is it?

Me:

It's something I'm not supposed to have.

Mom:

Oh really? I thought those were supposed to have five leaves.

Dad:

It does. This top one has five. Those lower ones only have three.

Mom:

Why do you have it?

Me:

It's green, it's winter. Everyone needs a plant.

Mom:

So what are you going to do with it?

Me:

When it gets big enough I am going to chop it down and smoke it. What should I do with it?

Mom:

Oh, I don't know. Put it in your brownies.

Me:

I like the way you think.

Mom:

Where did you get it?

Me:

From little seeds. I stuck 'em in dirt and up popped a plant.

Mom:

Where did you get the seeds?

Dad:

You shouldn't leave it in the window like that. It could make some people uptight.

Me:

Yeah, when it gets big enough to see from outside I will do something with it. Most people are not too uptight about what sort of houseplants you keep.

Dad:

Well, the war on drugs makes criminals out of harmless things. So be careful.

Me:

I hear you.

Dad:

This war on drugs is just wasting money on putting people in jail when they should be getting medical treatment. And the medical treatment could get paid for if they just tax and regulate marijuana rather than criminalize it.

Me:

Preaching to the choir here dad. Treating alcoholism like a disease has been way more effective than prohibition. Except that tax revenue and regulation are not the best reasons to legalize. Good reasons, but not the best reason for it.

Dad:

Oh?

Me:

Liberty and freedom. If this were a free country a harmless house plant wouldn't be a crime.

Labels: conversation, criminal, dad, drugs, house plant, mom, opinion, prohibition, war on drugs

Posted by: Montana Jones / 4:49 PM